Mature Marriage

This world that the Almighty God created abounds with many tales that are bizarre and incredible. People face many challenges, however a time comes when they feel they have to reveal some secrets so that they could be free. I have something to tell my readers and it is coming from a family member based in Abidjan, the commercial capital of Cote d�Ivoire. It was a tale that I found to be out of place but he asked me to put it in my column for my readers to read and think about it. He told me he talked to God and asked for His favour. Despite the fact that he had asked me to put it out, I still want to protect his identity so I will just name him Julian. I travelled to a village in Rio Muni, the mainland of Equatorial Guinea (the country consists of the island and the mainland). My family wanted to diversify by selling part of the company on the island and venturing into agriculture on the mainland. When I came back, Julian was in my house. We had not met for some years now and I initially found it a little bit awkward starting a discussion with him as I noticed the worried crease on his forehead. �Julian, I thank God you are alive and how did you manage to survive the dangerous days in Abidjan?� I finally broke the ice. �I need not go round in circles but tell you what happened and my incredible experiences,� he noted. After listening to the incredible story, I was left speechless. Julian, who celebrated his 35th birthday in January, this year, had his primary and secondary education here in Ghana before he joined his parents, who were engaged in the fishing business in one of the fishing villages near Abidjan. He continued his education by acquiring a degree in Finance and banking in Abidjan. Though his parents were permanent residents in Cote d�Ivoire, Julian preferred Ghana and used to come down during holidays and when he got a job in one of the banks he continued the custom. At age thirty-two, he got married to a beautiful Ivoirian lady whose mother was a regular customer at the bank where he was working. The father of the girl that Julian married was killed together with two of her siblings in the civil unrest during the regime of the military leader General Guei. The couple had a baby girl and was settling for a blissful married life when post-election standoff between Laurent Gbagbo and Alassane Ouattara in 2010 forced Julian�s wife and the child to seek refuge with his mother-in-law. Unfortunately, a mortar landed in the house, killing the wife and the child. Julian�s world came crashing down, the two victims were hurriedly buried, but the fighting intensified and it became impossible to move around the city. �I was totally held in my mother-in-law�s house as the fighting intensified. She became miserable, as the loss of her husband, three children and the grandchild began to affect her,� Julian said. �As the crisis continued, we were faced with an acute shortage of food and I was forced to venture out to get something however, on my way back the sporadic shooting started and a bullet scratched my right shoulder.� I managed to get to the house and my mother-in-law dressed the wound for me and I was forced to stay in bed for a week,� Julian disclosed. Julian revealed that after the recovery from that brush with the rebel soldiers, he tried to escape with his mother-in-law to another safe place because he thought the area was becoming very dangerous. It was at that critical period that he noticed his mother-in-law�s strange behavior and he initially thought she was going nuts. �For a whole day she would be crying and talking about the loss of her entire family and that she wanted her children to come back to her.� Julian said, adding that he was a little bit frightened because he thought the woman would start screaming and that would attract the warring factions to their hideout. �I was worried and I felt like running away alone to save myself however, I thought it would not be fair after all that the woman had done for me, so I stayed put.� He said one evening as he was sleeping, he felt someone�s hands on his chest and he realized it was her mother-in-law. He pulled himself up and in a worrying tone asked her what was happening. �I realized that she was crying and she told me in a very serious tone that she had decided to get a child from me to replace all the family members she had lost but I told her she was old and on top of that it was a taboo to do what she was asking for.� �She told me she was only forty-five years old and still fertile and that I should forget about the taboo thing since it was her own decision and that she did not want to go to the grave without a seed to continue her generation.� Julian said. My relation said she rejected the proposal but the lady was adamant and finally he was weakened, as several months of �hibernation� destroyed his weak defenses and for over two weeks, his mother-in-law became his de-facto bed warmer. �Now my brother, my mother-in-law is carrying twins in her stomach and they are mine. The war is over and we are living together but I want to get a transfer.� �Where?� I asked him. �I don�t know,� he replied, looking disturbed. I asked him again about his feelings toward his mother-in-law who is now his wife. He bluntly told me that he loved her and that he would not want to do anything to hurt her. He added that her age would not count as she is just 10 years old. I urged him to join his uncle�s Export and Import Company, headquartered in Gabon with branches in Central, Eastern and Southern Africa. He agreed and we called our uncle and explained things to him. Last Monday, Julian and the lady flew to Libreville to start a new life.