<<Print>>

Have you per chance watched the �Laugh a minute� comedy show on Viasat 1? If you haven�t, then do not try watching it because it is the most boring show I�ve ever seen. �Bore a minute� would be a more suitable title for the show. By the way, where is Nkomede? The last time I heard, he had been arrested and jailed in Obroniland for drug trafficking. That was over ten years ago. Even if the rumour is true, don�t you think he should be gaining his freedom by now? Hey my compatriots and their �they say, they say�! Hmm! Forgive me for the digression; was I not talking about the �Bore a minute� comedy show? There is consensus that the host of the show is anything but a comedian. A friend described him as a joker and not a comedian. Whatever he meant by that is beyond my thick skull. But, if management of the television station really wants to maintain and if possible increase its viewership, then it has to do something about the show. Otherwise, it risks being given the joker tag. We are all jokers, aren�t we? The deputy minister who created 1.6 million jobs in the comfort of his bedroom did not say he was cracking a joke, but we all know that was exactly what he did. And why wouldn�t he joke? We jokingly voted a bunch of jokers into office to crack jokes. So we have to jokingly applaud their effort even if we do not like their jokes. His colleague was very honest with us. He shamelessly proclaimed that he was a joker when he jokingly told staff of the Information Services Department (ISD) to look their compatriots in the eye and tell them cock and bull stories. You see, jokers do not know the difference between falsehood and embellishment. Embellishment is when you add flavour to a story to make it palatable. Embellishment is when a government buys a skinny sheep and you tell the world that it is a fat one. However, when a government buys a sheep and you tell the world that it is a cow, then you are in the realm of falsehood. We can forgive the Chief Jihadist because he has admitted that it was a joke. Do you reckon Barack Obama would stand on a U.N platform and talk about his country�s domestic achievements? He won�t do that because that is not the platform to promote the �Dzi wo fie asem� policy. Only jokers will do that! Our joker President stood on a U.N platform and talked about �free school uniforms�, �free exercise books�, �free laptops� and �free feeding�. In fact, he told the world that almost everything was free in this country. He also mentioned the elimination of 1,000 schools under trees and the construction of heavy infrastructure to boost the country�s economy. He insinuated that anyone who said he was not feeling the �better Asomdwekrom� agenda should be living in another country. A British friend who was then in the country laughed and said, �If your President is not joking, then you and your people are living in heaven.� �Don�t mind the President, he was only joking. He knows more than anyone else that my compatriots and I are practically living in hell,� I jokingly replied and we both burst into laughter. With the Wikileaks disclosure, one can never be more careful. I, therefore, did not tell my friend anything new. I only told him what he already knew. I jokingly explained to him that although the President ate, drank and slept with cat hunters, he never believed in cat hunting. He wondered how that could be because only birds of similar feathers flock together. I told him to look carefully at the President and tell me if he looked like a cat hunter. He laughed and told me to cut the joke. Was that my joke or the President�s, Abusuapanin? I do not eat cat meat; neither do I associate with cat hunters nor believe in cat hunting, so I do not care how cat hunters look. Perhaps, my only concern about cat hunting is the extinction of the various cat species from the surface of the earth. Indeed, that is my only concern! My friend enjoyed all the jokes we shared except one. He took offence when at the airport I jokingly said I wouldn�t mind if he reported to his government that he met a bunch of jokers in this country. He felt bad and asked if he looked like a spy. I replied with the question, �How do spies look?� He advertised a wry smile before saying good-bye. I knew our parting wasn�t the best but what do I care? We were only joking, weren�t we? In my solemn moments, I wondered why we always try to relate looks to character. Take a critical look at Massa Kwesi Pee and tell me if he looks like a backstabbing bloke. Does Uncle Obed Asamoah look like one who would spit and lick back his sputum? What about Agya Ofuntuo? Does he look like one who would say �reduce drastically� and increase exponentially? It must be pretty obvious to you by now that looks and character are not synonymous. So, sanctimonious presidents can be cat hunters, even if their looks say otherwise. Lest I forget, my white-skinned friend gave me a Rolex watch as a token of his appreciation for the reception accorded him during his stay here in Asomdwekrom. I believe, by Koku Anyidoho�s definition, I can jokingly say the token I received is nothing. I�m sure you heard the recent hullabaloo surrounding the gift from Regimanuel Gray Limited to Agya Ofuntuo. My compatriots are very confused. They still cannot tell if the mansion was a gift, a donation, a token or a small police post. Perhaps, that was yet another joke from another joker!